Twitter Wit: Brilliance in 140 Characters or Less
New York journal announces, "Twitter is the recent internet corporation correct now...the subsequent massive Thing;" the hot York instances calls it "one of the fastest-growing phenomena at the Internet;" Time journal claims "Twitter is on its approach to changing into the subsequent killer app;" and Newsweek notes that "Suddenly, it sort of feels as if all of the world′s a-twitter."
due to the fact its production in March 2006, Twitter has unleashed a torrent of self-expression from its six million participants all over the world, who ship and skim each one others′ "tweets," messages as much as a hundred and forty characters in size. pals use the positioning to make plans; family use it to stick attached; politicians use it to foyer for votes; and humorists use it to ideal their craft. in reality, Twitter clients have reinvented the vintage medium of the witticism in a website the place an individual could be a Dorothy Parker or an Oscar Wilde.
Twitter Wit is the 1st compilation of Twitter aphorisms, with submissions starting from quotidian vignettes like "I guess in Sweden the Ikea directions are in English" to bumper sticker-type quips like "I imagine the fowl of affection is the dove. My husband thinks it′s the swallow," and individuals starting from celebrities like Shaquille O′Neal, Jimmy Fallon, Penn Jillette, John Cleese, and Steven Fry to normal individuals with formerly unappreciated sharp tongues. that includes a foreword by means of Twitter co-founder Biz Stone, this approved anthology of the thousand so much so much shrewdpermanent and noteworthy "tweets" relates the range of human adventure in hilarious bite-sized pieces.
Insult jokes and write a limerick. sit back. the following tweet should be funnier. * * * as well as charging me an additional $50 to take a seat subsequent to my spouse, US airlines will cost $55 for our three baggage. The CEO should have a heroin behavior. mat NEW COMMANDMENT: THOU SHALT now not thelordyourgod a few humans say, “Drinking after you’ve simply woken is inappropriate,” and to them I say, “What when you get up at a party?” jakec simply observed a white man dancing and proposal, “What a dork.” Then.
phrases, suffering to slot a three-sentence funny story into a hundred and forty characters. one in every of my favourite Twitter gags is simply seven phrases lengthy: “You recognize what this guitar wishes? classes” (Tony_D). Twitter is the fashionable haiku, albeit with fewer cherry blossoms and extra wisecracks. Brevity is, the following, the soul of wit. The tweets during this booklet got here from hundreds and hundreds of clients. an individual can write one fairly humorous tweet. That’s the democratic great thing about the one-liner. yet a few humans flip Twitter wit into an obsession.
Homesick. So I’ve pretty well stopped going there altogether. delfie I by no means have an issue protecting “Christ in Christmas,” as I’m absolute to invoke his identify a number of occasions Christmas Eve assembling the kid’s toys. joeschmidt Packing for my buddy’s bachelor journey in New Orleans. No proposal what one wears whilst “clubbing,” so packing my “douchebag” Halloween gown. dens I’m no longer asserting that it’s the simplest, but when there's whatever higher than sizzling, freshly baked banana bread, I haven’t had intercourse.
think not going video clips with Philip Glass rankings. were you aware that Armageddon is a brooding and extreme meditation on mortality? phyllisstein strolling into the 5-yr-old’s bed room and announcing, “Looks like a princess *exploded* in here!” doesn't move over good with the 5-yr-old. zuhl i'm wondering how a lot that deficit clock expense. susie_c Like in “WALL•E,” my first date with my spouse used to be at a sell off, then into my roach-infested condo, the place I touched her as she was once handed out. awryone *.
Hiding? glessner James Brown didn’t write lyrics. He wrote instructions and directions. riebschlager My haircut went from “cool” to “Christian golfer” much quicker this time. scottsimpson I took the “Which meme are you?” quiz and the result's: the only the place You Photoshop whatever or no matter what. jasonpermenter there's no unwell that fab intercourse can’t treatment. other than nymphomania. Then i assume you’re fucked. mayjah whilst your emotions are top defined through a Jewel music, it’s most likely time.